Mark Twain Quotes, Funny Quotes, Lonely Quotes

If all the fools in this world should die, lordly God how lonely I should be.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Lonely Quotes

If you desire to drain to the dregs the fullest cup of scorn and hatred that a fellow human being can pour out for you, let a young mother hear you call dear baby 'it.'

5 years ago

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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Funny Quotes , Mom Quotes

This may sound a little West Texan to you, but I like it. When I'm talking about.. when I'm talking about myself, and when he's talking about myself, all of us are talking about me.

5 years ago

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

As he was valiant, I honour him. But as he was ambitious, I slew him.

5 years ago

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Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

In heaven, all the interesting people are missing.

5 years ago

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Tags : Friedrich Nietzsche Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

Dombey sat in the corner of the darkened room in the great arm-chair by the bedside, and Son lay tucked up warm in a little basket bedstead, carefully disposed on a low settee immediately in front of the fire and close to it, as if his constitution were analogous to that of a muffin, and it was essential to toast him brown while he was very new.

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

NEIGHBOR, n. One whom we are commanded to love as ourselves, and who does all he knows how to make us disobedient.

5 years ago

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

I am sorry for those that disagree with me because I know that they are wrong.

5 years ago

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Tags : Woodrow Wilson Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sorry Quotes

The secret to success is to offend the greatest number of people.

5 years ago

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Work Quotes

There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again.

5 years ago

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Stupid Quotes

If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn't sit for a month.

5 years ago

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Tags : Theodore Roosevelt Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

A dictatorship would be a heck of a lot easier, there's no question about it.

5 years ago

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

There is more to be said for stupidity than people imagine. Personally I have a great admiration for stupidity. It is a sort of fellow-feeling, I suppose.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , People Quotes

My toughest fight was with my first wife.

5 years ago

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Tags : Muhammad Ali Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sports Quotes

Eating words has never given me indigestion.

5 years ago

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Health Quotes

I have made it a rule never to smoke more than one cigar at a time.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Smoking Quotes

Every rascal is not a thief, but every thief is a rascal.

5 years ago

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Tags : Aristotle Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

To succeed in the other trades, capacity must be shown; in the law, concealment of it will do.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I admire the serene assurance of those who have religious faith. It is wonderful to observe the calm confidence of a Christian with four aces.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Christian Quotes