Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Nature Quotes, Support Quotes

LAP, n. One of the most important organs of the female system - an admirable provision of nature for the repose of infancy, but chiefly useful in rural festivities to support plates of cold chicken and heads of adult males.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Nature Quotes , Support Quotes

CALLOUS, adj. Gifted with great fortitude to bear the evils afflicting another. When Zeno was told that one of his enemies was no more he was observed to be deeply moved. "What!" said one of his disciples, "you weep at the death of an enemy?" "Ah, 'tis true," replied the great Stoic; "but you should see me smile at the death of a friend.".

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Evil Quotes , Death Of A Friend Quotes

CALUMNUS, n. A graduate of the School for Scandal.

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Advice: The suggestions you give someone else which you hope will work for your benefit.

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BEG, v. To ask for something with an earnestness proportioned to the belief that it will not be given.

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RECONCILIATION, n. A suspension of hostilities. An armed truce for the purpose of digging up the dead.

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Opposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the government from running amuck by hamstringing it.

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REASON, n. Propensitate of prejudice.

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ASS, n. A public singer with a good voice but no ear.

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An election is nothing more than the advanced auction of stolen goods.

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DIAPHRAGM, n. A muscular partition separating disorders of the chest from disorders of the bowels.

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CLOCK, n. A machine of great moral value to man, allaying his concern for the future by reminding him what a lot of time remains to him.

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In forgiving an injury be somewhat ceremonious, lest your magnanimity be construed as indifference.

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If you would be accounted great by your contemporaries, be not too much greater than they.

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MUMMY, n. - an ancient Egyptian handy, too, in museums in gratifying the vulgar curiosity that serves to distinguish man from the lower animals.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Men Quotes , Animal Quotes

TENACITY, n. A certain quality of the human hand in its relation to the coin of the realm. It attains its highest development in the hand of authority and is considered a serviceable equipment for a career in politics.

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ADDER, n. A species of snake. So called from its habit of adding funeral outlays to the other expenses of living.

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gratitude, n. A sentiment lying midway between a benefit received and a benefit expected.

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RIBALDRY, n. Censorious language by another concerning oneself.

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Disobey n:To celebrate with an appropriate ceremony the maturity of a command

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Maturity Quotes , Celebrate Quotes