Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Writing Quotes, Character Quotes

GOOSE, n. A bird that supplies quills for writing. These, by some occult process of nature, are penetrated and suffused with various degrees of the bird's intellectual energies and emotional character, so that when inked and drawn mechanically across paper by a person called an "author," there results a very fair and accurate transcript of the fowl's thought and feeling. The difference in geese, as discovered by this ingenious method, is considerable: many are found to have only trivial and insignificant powers, but some are seen to be very great geese indeed.

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OUT-OF-DOORS, n. That part of one's environment upon which no government has been able to collect taxes. Chiefly useful to inspire poets.

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SYLLOGISM, n. A logical formula consisting of a major and a minor assumption and an inconsequent.

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There is nothing new under the sun but there are lots of old things we don't know.

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Perseverance - a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.

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To seek a justification for a decision already made.

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REVOLUTION, n. In politics, an abrupt change in the form of misgovernment. . . . the substitution of the rule of an Administration for that of a Ministry, whereby the welfare and happiness of the people were advanced a full half-inch.

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PLAGIARIZE, v. To take the thought or style of another writer whom one has never, never read.

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Historian - a broad-gauge gossip.

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CENTAUR, n. One of a race of persons who lived before the division of labor had been carried to such a pitch of differentiation, and who followed the primitive economic maxim, "Every man his own horse."

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RECONCILIATION, n. A suspension of hostilities. An armed truce for the purpose of digging up the dead.

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TENACITY, n. A certain quality of the human hand in its relation to the coin of the realm. It attains its highest development in the hand of authority and is considered a serviceable equipment for a career in politics.

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ILLUSTRIOUS, adj. Suitably placed for the shafts of malice, envy and detraction.

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Nature's fortuitous manifestation of her purposeless objectionableness.

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plagiarism, n. A literary coincidence compounded of a discreditable priority and an honorable subsequence.

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GOOD, adj. Sensible, madam, to the worth of this present writer. Alive, sir, to the advantages of letting him alone.

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gratitude, n. A sentiment lying midway between a benefit received and a benefit expected.

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An aged Burgundy runs with a beardless Port. I cherish the fancy that Port speaks sentences of wisdom, Burgundy sings the inspired Ode.

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CONGRESS, n. A body of men who meet to repeal laws.

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To renounce an honor for an advantage. To renounce an advantage for a greater advantage.

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