Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Death Quotes, Dying Quotes

Epitaph: An inscription on a tomb showing that virtues acquired by death have a retroactive effect.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Death Quotes , Dying Quotes

EXPOSTULATION, n. One of the many methods by which fools prefer to lose their friends.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Friendship Quotes , Fool Quotes

A man is the sum of his ancestors; to reform him you must begin with a dead ape and work downward through a million graves. He is like the lower end of a suspended chain; you can sway him slightly to the right or the left, but remove your hand and he falls into line with the other links.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Fall Quotes , Men Quotes

Justice is a commodity which in a more or less adulterated condition the State sells to the citizen as a reward for his allegiance, taxes and personal service.

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Inhumanity, n. One of the signal and characteristic qualities of humanity.

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Good-bye -- if you hear of my being stood up against a stone wall and shot to rags please know that I think that a pretty good way to depart this life. It beats old age, disease or falling down the cellar stairs.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wall Quotes , Fall Quotes

PLATONIC, adj. Pertaining to the philosophy of Socrates. Platonic Love is a fool's name for the affection between a disability and a frost.

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In forgiving an injury be somewhat ceremonious, lest your magnanimity be construed as indifference.

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If you want to read a perfect book there is only one way: write it.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Book Quotes , Writing Quotes

Acquaintance: "A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to. A degree of friendship called slight when its object is poor or obscure, and intimate when he is rich or famous.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Degrees Quotes , Rich Quotes

Responsibility, n. A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck or one's neighbor. In the days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star.

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Labor is one of the processes by which A acquires property for B.

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Painting, n.: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather, and exposing them to the critic.

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Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

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ETHNOLOGY, n. The science that treats of the various tribes of Man, as robbers, thieves, swindlers, dunces, lunatics, idiots and ethnologists.

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STORY, n. A narrative, commonly untrue. The truth of the stories here following has, however, not been successfully impeached.

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An absolute monarchy is one in which the sovereign does as he pleases so long as he pleases the assassins.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Long Quotes , Doe Quotes

The bold and discerning writer who, recognizing the truth that language must grow by innovation if it grow at all, makes new words and uses the old in an unfamiliar sense has no following and is tartly reminded that 'it isn't in the dictionary' - although down to the time of the first lexicographer no author ever had used a word that was in the dictionary.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Innovation Quotes , Lexicographer Quotes

PARDON, v. To remit a penalty and restore to the life of crime. To add to the lure of crime the temptation of ingratitude.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Life Quotes , Temptation Quotes

CARTESIAN, adj. Relating to Descartes, author of 'Cogito ergo sum' to demonstrate the reality of human existence. The dictum might be improved 'Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum' 'I think that I think, therefore I think that I am' as close an approach.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Reality Quotes , Thinking Quotes