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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- Male, A member of the unconsidered or negligible gender. The male of the human race is commonly known to the female as Mere Man. The Genus has two varieties: good providers and bad providers.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Men Quotes , Race Quotes
- As a means of dispensing formulated ignorance our boasted public school system is not without merit; it spreads out education sufficiently thin to give everyone enough to make him a more competent fool than he would have been without it.
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- When you have made a catalogue of your friend's faults it is only fair to supply him with a duplicate, so that he may know yours.
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- Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.
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- MONOSYLLABIC, adj. Composed of words of one syllable . . . Commonly Saxon - that is to say, words of a barbarous people destitute of ideas and incapable of any but the most elementary sentiments and emotions.
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- REALISM, n. The art of depicting nature as it is seem by toads. The charm suffusing a landscape painted by a mole, or a story written by a measuring-worm.
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- The clarinet is a musical instrument the only thing worse than which is two.
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- DEPENDENT, adj. Reliant upon another's generosity for the support which you are not in a position to exact from his fears.
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- LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder.
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- Prescription: A physician's guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.
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- RUSSIAN, n. A person with a Caucasian body and a Mongolian soul. A Tartar Emetic.
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- APOTHECARY, n. The physician's accomplice, undertaker's benefactor and grave worm's provider
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- A man is known by the company he organizes.
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- Witticism. A sharp and clever remark, usually quoted and seldom noted; what the Philistine is pleased to call a joke.
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- Alligator: The crocodile of America, superior in every detail to the crocodile of the effete monarchies of the Old World.
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- Age is provident because the less future we have the more we fear it.
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- Book - Learning : The dunce's derisive term for all knowledge that transcends his own impertinent ignorance.
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- EPIGRAM, n. A short, sharp saying in prose or verse, frequently characterize by acidity or acerbity and sometimes by wisdom.
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- ENOUGH, pro. All there is in the world if you like it.
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- RABBLE, n. In a republic, those who exercise a supreme authority tempered by fraudulent elections. The rabble is like the sacred Simurgh, of Arabian fable - omnipotent on condition that it do nothing.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Exercise Quotes , Republic Quotes