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Funny Quotes
Funny Quotes
957
Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, and it holds the world together.
5 years ago
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Oprah Winfrey Quotes
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The United States invariably does the right thing, after having exhausted every other alternative.
5 years ago
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Winston Churchill Quotes
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It is obvious that all sense has gone out of modern marriage; which is, however, no objection to marriage but to modernity.
5 years ago
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Friedrich Nietzsche Quotes
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I observe the physician with the same diligence as the disease.
5 years ago
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John Donne Quotes
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Men at most differ as Heaven and Earth, but women, worst and best, as Heaven and Hell.
5 years ago
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Alfred Lord Tennyson Quotes
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I must have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much as a week sometimes to make it up.
6 years ago
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Mark Twain Quotes
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When I am king, I will revise the sexual bases system so that getting to first base will include oral sex and sodomy!
6 years ago
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Adam Carolla Quotes
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'Tis a superstition to insist on a special diet. All is made at last of the same chemical atoms.
5 years ago
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Ralph Waldo Emerson Quotes
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Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.
5 years ago
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George Bernard Shaw Quotes
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Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.
5 years ago
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Albert Einstein Quotes
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When I sell liquor, it's bootlegging. When my patrons serve it on a silver tray on Lakeshore Drive, it's hospitality.
6 years ago
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Al Capone Quotes
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... Waiter! raw beef-steak for the gentleman's eye,-nothing like raw beef-steak for a bruise, sir; cold lamp-post very good, but lamp-post inconvenient-damned odd standing in the open street half-an-hour, with your eye against a lamp.
5 years ago
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Charles Dickens Quotes
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When the ax came into the forest the trees said the handle is one of us.
5 years ago
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Alice Walker Quotes
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When one has not had a good father, one must create one.
5 years ago
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Friedrich Nietzsche Quotes
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Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.
5 years ago
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Confucius Quotes
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For the journalist, anything probable is gospel truth.
5 years ago
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Honore De Balzac Quotes
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Some men are like musical glasses; to produce their finest tones you must keep them wet.
5 years ago
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Samuel Taylor Coleridge Quotes
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Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong.
5 years ago
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Oscar Wilde Quotes
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Let me see you ride a donkey over my green again, and as sure as you have a head upon your shoulders, I'll knock your bonnet off, and tread upon it!
5 years ago
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One should always play fairly when one has the winning cards.
5 years ago
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