George Bernard Shaw Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Funny Quotes

I dislike feeling at home when I am abroad.

5 years ago

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Knowledge is invariably a matter of degree: you cannot put your finger upon even the simplest datum and say this we know.

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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Genius is born-not paid

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes

Everyone keeps saying, "Oh my God, oh my God, how intimidating." It's like saying, "How could you date Jennifer Aniston after she's been with Brad Pitt?" I don't care.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

A man who does not think for himself does not think at all.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

I can stand brute force, but brute reason is quite unbearable. There is something unfair about its use. It is hitting below the intellect.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.

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Tags : Jane Austen Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

A man can well afford to be as bold as brass, my good fellow, when he gets gold in exchange!

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals.

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Tags : Agnes Repplier Quotes , Funny Quotes , Women Quotes

Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

I know what I believe. I will continue to articulate what I believe and what I believe - I believe what I believe is right.

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Stupid Quotes

Most modern calendars mar the sweet simplicity of our lives by reminding us that each day that passes is the anniversary of some perfectly uninteresting event.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Anniversary Quotes

The girls are beautiful in Hollywood - and enough silicon to caulk a sink.

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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Beautiful Quotes

The roulette table pays nobody except him that keeps it. Nevertheless a passion for gaming is common, though a passion for keeping roulette tables is unknown.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Money Quotes

What would men be without women? Scarce, sir...mighty scarce.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

I drew the duck blue because I've never seen a blue duck before and, to be honest with you I wanted to see a blue duck.

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Tags : Adam Sandler Quotes , Funny Quotes , Blue Quotes

I have absolutely no pleasure in the stimulants in which I sometimes so madly indulge. It has not been in the pursuit of pleasure that I have periled life and reputation and reason. It has been the desperate attempt to escape from torturing memories, from a sense of insupportable loneliness and a dread of some strange impending doom.

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Tags : Edgar Allan Poe Quotes , Funny Quotes , Pain Quotes

No man knows he is young while he is young.

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Tags : Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes

To lose one parent may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Family Quotes

Time and tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of 30.

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Tags : Robert Frost Quotes , Funny Quotes , Birthday Quotes