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Funny Quotes 957
- There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again.
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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Stupid Quotes
- If a student takes the whole series of my folklore courses including the graduate seminars, he or she should learn something about fieldwork, something about bibliography, something about how to carry out library research, and something about how to publish that research.
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Tags : Alan Dundes Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- We have a criminal jury system which is superior to any in the world and it's efficiency is only marred by the difficulty of finding twelve men every day who don't know anything and can't read-
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- There is no finer investment for any community than putting milk into babies.
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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Uplifting Quotes
- We learn from history that we learn nothing from history.
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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
- Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes
- Border relations between Canada and Mexico have never been better.
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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
- We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time.
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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Marriage Quotes
- The only way a woman can ever reform a man is by boring him so completely that he loses all possible interest in life.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes
- I always pass on good advice. It is the only thing to do with it. It is never of any use to oneself.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- This City is what it is because our citizens are what they are.
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Tags : Plato Quotes , Funny Quotes , Cities Quotes
- I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.
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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes
- Journalists are like dogs, when ever anything moves they begin to bark.
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Tags : Arthur Schopenhauer Quotes , Funny Quotes , Dog Quotes
- The difference between screwing around and science is writing it down.
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Tags : Adam Savage Quotes , Funny Quotes , Writing Quotes
- I want to go ahead of Father Time with a scythe of my own.
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Tags : H. G. Wells Quotes , Funny Quotes , New Year Quotes
- Experience is one thing you can't get for nothing.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Positive Quotes
- Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- I have lost friends, some by death...others by sheer inability to cross the street.
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Tags : Virginia Woolf Quotes , Funny Quotes , Friendship Quotes
- No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman.
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Tags : Honore De Balzac Quotes , Funny Quotes , Marriage Quotes