Adam Sandler Quotes, Funny Quotes, Wire Quotes

Sir one more comment like that and I will strangle you with my microphone wire!

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Sandler Quotes , Funny Quotes , Wire Quotes

The first condition of understanding a foreign country is to smell it.

5 years ago

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Tags : Rudyard Kipling Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.

5 years ago

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

The only way to be sure of catching a train is to miss the one before it.

5 years ago

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Tags : Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes , Funny Quotes , Travel Quotes

When I was young I thought that money was the most important thing in life; now that I am old I know that it is.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

Imagination was given to man to compensate him for what he is not; a sense of humor to console him for what he is.

5 years ago

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Tags : Francis Bacon Quotes , Funny Quotes , Laughter Quotes

The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.

5 years ago

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Tags : Albert Einstein Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

I don't think the discus will ever attract any interest until they let us start throwing them at one another.

6 years ago

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Tags : Al Oerter Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Many readers judge of the power of a book by the shock it gives their feelings - as some savage tribes determine the power of muskets by their recoil; that being considered best which fairly prostrates the purchaser.

5 years ago

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Tags : Henry Wadsworth Longfellow Quotes , Funny Quotes , Reading Quotes

I find no sweeter fat than sticks to my own bones.

5 years ago

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Tags : Walt Whitman Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

We think our fathers fools, so wise we grow. Our wiser sons, no doubt will think us so.

5 years ago

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Tags : Alexander Pope Quotes , Funny Quotes , Wise Quotes

It being a part of Mrs. Pipchin's system not to encourage a child's mind to develop and expand itself like a young flower, but to open it by force like an oyster.

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Children Quotes

Litigant. A person about to give up his skin for the hope of retaining his bones.

5 years ago

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Funny Quotes , Hope Quotes

"Oh!" said my aunt, "I was not aware at first to whom I had the pleasure of objecting."

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Fool me once, shame on - shame on you. Fool me - you can't get fooled again.

5 years ago

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Stupid Quotes

There is only one thing in life worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers.

5 years ago

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Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Funny Quotes , Inspiration Quotes

The last thing one discovers in composing a work is what to put first.

5 years ago

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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Funny Quotes , Work Quotes

A book is made from a tree. It is an assemblage of flat, flexible parts (still called "leaves") imprinted with dark pigmented squiggles. One glance at it and you hear the voice of another person, perhaps someone dead for thousands of years. Across the millennia, the author is speaking, clearly and silently, inside your head, directly to you. Writing is perhaps the greatest of human inventions, binding together people, citizens of distant epochs, who never knew one another. Books break the shackles of time ― proof that humans can work magic.

5 years ago

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Tags : Carl Sagan Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Mr. Bazzard's father, being a Norfolk farmer, would have furiously laid about him with a flail, a pitch-fork, and every agricultural implement available for assaulting purposes, on the slightest hint of his son's having written a play.

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Father Quotes