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Funny Quotes
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Funny Quotes 957
- Martyrdom covers a multitude of sins.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes
- He took the bride about the neck and kissed her lips with such a clamorous smack that at the parting all the church did echo.
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Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Funny Quotes , Kissing Quotes
- A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.
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Tags : Jane Austen Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes
- He hasn't an enemy in the world, and none of his friend like him.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
- At 50, a man can be an ass without being an optimist but not an optimist without being an ass
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- Women are made to be loved, not understood.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes
- I think war is a dangerous place.
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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Peace Quotes
- Few women care to be laughed at and men not at all, except for large sums of money.
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Tags : Alan Ayckbourn Quotes , Funny Quotes , Money Quotes
- Who is this Baby Ruth? And what does she do?
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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Baseball Quotes
- "It's an old habit of mine, Wal'r," said the Captain, "any time these fifty year. When you see Ned Cuttle bite his nails, Wal'r, then you may know that Ned Cuttle's aground."
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Beauty is an outward gift, which is seldom despised, except by those to whom it has been refused.
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Tags : Ralph Waldo Emerson Quotes , Funny Quotes , Beauty Quotes
- Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals.
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Tags : Agnes Repplier Quotes , Funny Quotes , Women Quotes
- It is one of the superstitions of the human mind to have imagined that virginity could be a virtue.
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Tags : Voltaire Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes
- I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- Intellectuals solve problems, geniuses prevent them.
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Tags : Albert Einstein Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- A poet can survive everything but a misprint.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes
- Whenever a man's friends begin to compliment him about looking young, he may be sure that they think he is growing old.
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Tags : Victor Hugo Quotes , Funny Quotes , Birthday Quotes
- You don't have to deserve your mother's love. You have to deserve your father s. He's more particular. The father is always a Republican towards his son, and his mother's always a Democrat.
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Tags : Robert Frost Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes
- If you desire to drain to the dregs the fullest cup of scorn and hatred that a fellow human being can pour out for you, let a young mother hear you call dear baby 'it.'
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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Funny Quotes , Mom Quotes
- I always like to know everything about my new friends, and nothing about my old ones.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes