Mark Twain Quotes, Funny Quotes, America Quotes

It was wonderful to find America, but it would have been more wonderful to miss it.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , America Quotes

One of the great things about books is sometimes there are some fantastic pictures.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

In particular, there was a butler in a blue coat and bright buttons, who gave quite a winey flavour to the table beer; he poured it out so superbly.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

You can always rely on America to do the right thing -- once it has exhausted the alternatives.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

By giving us the opinions of the uneducated, journalism keeps us in touch with the ignorance of the community.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

The secret to success is to offend the greatest number of people.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Work Quotes

Whenever cannibals are on the brink of starvation, Heaven, in its infinite mercy, sends them a fat missionary.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

The majority of the stupid is invincible and guaranteed for all time. The terror of their tyranny, however, is alleviated by their lack of consistency.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Albert Einstein Quotes , Funny Quotes , Stupid Quotes

Confidence is the sexiest thing a woman can have. It's much sexier than any body part.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Aimee Mullins Quotes , Funny Quotes , Beauty Quotes

A modest ring at the bell at length allayed her fears, and Miss Benton, hurrying into her own room and shutting herself up, in order that she might preserve that appearance of being taken by surprise which is so essential to the polite reception of visitors, awaited their coming with a smiling countenance.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Had be been Shakespeare, he would then have written Troilus and Cressidato brand the offending sex; but being only a little dog, he began to bite them.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Robert Louis Stevenson Quotes , Funny Quotes , Dog Quotes

Know the rules well, so you can break them effectively.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Dalai Lama Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

The superfluous, a very necessary thing.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Voltaire Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Jane Austen Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn't know.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

There is nothing so annoying as to have two people talking when you're busy interrupting.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Hilarious Quotes

It comes to pass oft that a terrible oath, with a swaggering accent sharply twanged off, gives manhood more approbation than ever proof itself would have earned him.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sports Quotes

The world is a stage, but the play is badly cast.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes