William Shakespeare Quotes, Funny Quotes, Inspiration Quotes

The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers.

5 years ago

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Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Funny Quotes , Inspiration Quotes

Every saint has a past, and every sinner has a future.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

The true triumph of reason is that it enables us to get along with those who do not possess it.

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Tags : Voltaire Quotes , Funny Quotes , Triumph Quotes

The role of humour is to make people fall down and writhe on the Axminster, and that is the top and bottom of it.

6 years ago

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Tags : Alan Coren Quotes , Funny Quotes , Fall Quotes

Will the highways on the Internet become more few?

5 years ago

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Stupid Quotes

Men tend to lie when it comes to sexual conquests. You should hear some of the ego-driven lies my friends have told me: 'Swear to God, man - the hooker gave the money back.'

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Lying Quotes

Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

I have absolutely no pleasure in the stimulants in which I sometimes so madly indulge. It has not been in the pursuit of pleasure that I have periled life and reputation and reason. It has been the desperate attempt to escape from torturing memories, from a sense of insupportable loneliness and a dread of some strange impending doom.

5 years ago

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Tags : Edgar Allan Poe Quotes , Funny Quotes , Pain Quotes

It being a part of Mrs. Pipchin's system not to encourage a child's mind to develop and expand itself like a young flower, but to open it by force like an oyster.

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Children Quotes

No orator can top the one who can give good nicknames.

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Tags : Ralph Waldo Emerson Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

If I am occasionally a little over-dressed, I make up for it by being always immensely over-educated.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Littles Quotes

Humor is also a way of saying something serious.

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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Dammit Sir, it's your duty to get married. You can't always be living for pleasure!

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Marriage Quotes

A crime persevered in a thousand centuries ceases to be a crime, and becomes a virtue. This is the law of custom, and custom supersedes all other forms of law.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Deceiving others. That is what the world calls a romance.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

When Asian people grow up fast they go to college at 13. White people grow up fast it's about fudge packing and triple D's at 13.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Growing Up Quotes

Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and can't, and the other half who have nothing to say and keep on saying it.

5 years ago

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Tags : Robert Frost Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

If you want something said, ask a man. If you want something done, ask a woman.

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Tags : Margaret Thatcher Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

I have lost friends, some by death...others by sheer inability to cross the street.

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Tags : Virginia Woolf Quotes , Funny Quotes , Friendship Quotes

Everything happens to everybody sooner or later if there is time enough.

5 years ago

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Change Quotes