Charles Dickens Quotes, Funny Quotes, Humorous Quotes

Poor Mr. Pickwick! ... If he played a wrong card, Miss Bolo looked a small armoury of daggers; if he stopped to consider which was the right one, Lady Snuphanuph would throw herself back in her chair, and smile with a mingled glance of impatience and pity to Mrs. Colonel Wugsby, at which Mrs. Colonel Wugsby would shrug up her shoulders, and cough, as much as to say she wondered whether he ever would begin.

5 years ago

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There is only one thing in life worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Everyone is a moon, and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Fake People Quotes

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time.

4 years ago

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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things.

4 years ago

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Sure there have been injuries and deaths in boxing - but none of them serious.

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Tags : Alan Minter Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sports Quotes

All generalizations are false, including this one.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Truth Quotes

A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes

I am a Catholic. Basically, the Catholic religion is 'If it feels good - stop.'

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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

I was always treated as if I had insisted on being born, in opposition to the dictates of reason, religion, and morality, and against the dissuadinig arguments of my best friends.

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Those who are too smart to engage in politics are punished by being governed by those who are dumber.

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Tags : Plato Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

The basis of action is lack of imagination. It is the last resource of those who know not how to dream.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

They misunderestimated me.

4 years ago

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Nothing helps scenery like bacon and eggs.

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That's an interesting philosophical question. When your boner goes away, is that one gone... forever?

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Philosophical Quotes

... As to sleep, you know, I never sleep now. I might be a Watchman, except that I don't get any pay, and he's got nothing on his mind.

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Happy, happy Christmas, that can win us back to the delusions of our childhood days, recall to the old man the pleasures of his youth, and transport the traveler back to his own fireside and quiet home!

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Christmas Quotes

Men are like bank accounts. Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.

4 years ago

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Men Quotes

I've never not finished a masturbatory session or a pizza. Those are the two things I've never left behind.

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes