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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- A man is known by the company he organizes.
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- To be comic is merely to be playful, but wit is a serious matter. To laugh at it is to confess that you do not understand.
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- Consult: To seek approval for a course of action already decided upon.
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- Labor is one of the processes by which A acquires property for B.
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- WITCH, n. (1) Any ugly and repulsive old woman, in a wicked league with the devil. (2) A beautiful and attractive young woman, in wickedness a league beyond the devil.
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- Heaven lies about us in our infancy and the world begins lying about us pretty soon afterward.
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- War: A by-product of the arts of peace.
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- REPUBLIC, n. A nation in which, the thing governing and the thing governed being the same, there is only a permitted authority to enforce an optional obedience.
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- Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.
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- SCRAP-BOOK, n. A book that is commonly edited by a fool. Many persons of some small distinction compile scrap-books containing whatever they happen to read about themselves or employ others to collect.
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- JOSS-STICKS- Small sticks burned by the Chinese in their pagan tomfoolery, in imitation of certain sacred rites of our holy religion.
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- Road, n. A strip of land along which one may pass from where it is too tiresome to be to where it is futile to go.
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- HYENA, n. A beast held in reverence by some oriental nations from its habit of frequenting at night the burial-places of the dead. But the medical student does that
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- PATRIOT, n. One to whom the interests of a part seem superior to those of the whole. The dupe of statesmen and the tool of conquerors.
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- DEPENDENT, adj. Reliant upon another's generosity for the support which you are not in a position to exact from his fears.
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- MONARCH, n. A person engaged in reigning. Formerly the monarch ruled, as the derivation of the word attests, and as many subjects have had occasion to learn.
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- NIHILIST, n. A Russian who denies the existence of anything but Tolstoi. The leader of the school is Tolstoi.
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- Introduction - a social ceremony invented by the devil for the gratification of his servants and the plaguing of his enemies.
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- PRIMATE, n. The head of a church, especially a State church supported by involuntary contributions. The Primate of England is the Archbishop of Canterbury, an amiable old gentleman, who occupies Lambeth Palace when living and Westminster Abbey when dead. He is commonly dead.
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- GOOD, adj. Sensible, madam, to the worth of this present writer. Alive, sir, to the advantages of letting him alone.
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