George Bernard Shaw Quotes, Funny Quotes, Humorous Quotes

A doctor's reputation is made by the number of eminent men who die under his care.

5 years ago

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

There is, in fact, no law or government at all; and it is wonderful how well things go on without them.

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Tags : Lord Byron Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I was always treated as if I had insisted on being born, in opposition to the dictates of reason, religion, and morality, and against the dissuadinig arguments of my best friends.

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I have never heard enough classical music to be able to enjoy it; & the simple truth is, I detest it. Not mildly, but will all my heart. To me an opera is the very climax & cap-stone of the absurd, the fantastic the unjustifiable. I hate the very name of opera - partly because of the nights of suffering I have endured in its presence, & partly because I want to love it and can't.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Hate Quotes

God created sex. Priests created marriage.

5 years ago

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Tags : Voltaire Quotes , Funny Quotes , Marriage Quotes

I never play cricket. It requires one to assume such indecent postures.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.

6 years ago

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Tags : A. A. Milne Quotes , Funny Quotes , Inspiring Quotes

The Cardinal is at his wit's end - it is true that he had not far to go.

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Tags : Lord Byron Quotes , Funny Quotes , Stupidity Quotes

You can't imagine what a pleasure this complete laziness is to me: not a thought in my brain- you might send a ball rolling through it!

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Tags : Leo Tolstoy Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sloth Quotes

His money is twice tainted: taint yours and taint mine.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Money Quotes

Anyone who has the power to make you believe absurdities has the power to make you commit injustices.

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Tags : Voltaire Quotes , Funny Quotes , Peace Quotes

If there were no bad people, there would be no good lawyers.

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Law Quotes

I know what I believe. I will continue to articulate what I believe and what I believe - I believe what I believe is right.

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Stupid Quotes

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Clever Quotes

NAPOLEON: What shall we do with this soldier, Giuseppe? Everything he says is wrong. GIUSEPPE: Make him a general, Excellency, and then everything he says will be right.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

As he was valiant, I honour him. But as he was ambitious, I slew him.

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Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

I love acting. It is so much more real than life.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

I don't think the discus will ever attract any interest until they let us start throwing them at one another.

6 years ago

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Tags : Al Oerter Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

The movement of life has its rest in its own music.

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Tags : Rabindranath Tagore Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Do not do unto others as you expect they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same.

5 years ago

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes