Oscar Wilde Quotes, Love Quotes, Funny Quotes

Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

[Ulysses is] the work of a queasy undergraduate scratching his pimples.

4 years ago

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Tags : Virginia Woolf Quotes , Funny Quotes , Pimples Quotes

Farewell, fair cruelty.

5 years ago

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Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Please do not shoot the pianist. He is doing his best.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes

On how to make the game more exciting - Eliminate the referees, raise the basket four feet, double the size of the basketball, limit the height of the players to 5 feet 9 inches, bring back the centre jump, allow taxi drivers in for free and allow the players to carry guns.

5 years ago

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Tags : Al McGuire Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

I've got a hockey record, I took off my skate and tried to stab a guy, I'm the only person who ever tried that.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Sandler Quotes , Funny Quotes , Hockey Quotes

A dictatorship would be a heck of a lot easier, there's no question about it.

4 years ago

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Dumb as a drum vith a hole in it, sir.

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hand.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Believe Quotes

No, my friend, I am not drunk. I have just been to the dentist, and need not return for another six months! Is it not the most beautiful thought? --Poirot

5 years ago

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Tags : Agatha Christie Quotes , Funny Quotes , Beautiful Quotes

Do the right thing. It will gratify some people and astonish the rest.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

All happy families resemble one another, each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.

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Tags : Leo Tolstoy Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.

5 years ago

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Tags : Ernest Hemingway Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes

Americans spend 6 billion hours a year filling out their tax reforms.

4 years ago

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Money Quotes

Do you not know I am a woman? when I think, I must speak.

5 years ago

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Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Funny Quotes , Women Quotes

Historians are like deaf people who go on answering questions that no one has asked them.

5 years ago

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Tags : Leo Tolstoy Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.

5 years ago

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Tags : Robert Frost Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

A dog reflects the family life. Whoever saw a frisky dog in a gloomy family, or a sad dog in a happy one? Snarling people have snarling dogs, dangerous people have dangerous ones.

5 years ago

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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Funny Quotes , Family Quotes

There is, in fact, no law or government at all; and it is wonderful how well things go on without them.

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Tags : Lord Byron Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Out upon merry Christmas! What's Christmas time to you but a time for paying bills without money; a time for finding yourself a year older, but not an hour richer...? If I could work my will," said Scrooge indignantly, "every idiot who goes about with 'Merry Christmas' upon his lips should be boiled with his won pudding, and buried with a stake of holly through his heart. He should!

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Christmas Quotes