Robert Frost Quotes, Funny Quotes, College Quotes

College is a refuge from hasty judgment.

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For truth is always strange; stranger than fiction.

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Tags : Lord Byron Quotes , Funny Quotes , Truth Quotes

Not to have control over the senses is like sailing in a rudderless ship, bound to break to pieces on coming in contact with the very first rock.

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Tags : Mahatma Gandhi Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Everyone who has ever built anywhere a "new heaven" first found the power thereto in his own hell.

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Tags : Friedrich Nietzsche Quotes , Funny Quotes , Government Quotes

Morality consists of suspecting other people of not being legally married.

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You shouldn't be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.

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Men are like bank accounts. Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Men Quotes

We spent as much money as we could and got as little for it as people could make up their minds to give us. We were always more or less miserable, and most of our acquaintance were in the same condition. There was a gay fiction among us that we were constantly enjoying ourselves, and a skeleton truth that we never did. To the best of my belief, our case was in the last aspect a rather common one.

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Money Quotes

God created war so that Americans would learn geography.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

The typewriting machine, when played with expression, is no more annoying than the piano when played by a sister or near relation.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sister Quotes

Men are like bank accounts. The more money, the more interest they generate.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Hilarious Quotes

Suppose the world were only one of God's jokes, would you work any the less to make it a good joke instead of a bad one?

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Old age hath yet his honour and his toil.

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Tags : Alfred Lord Tennyson Quotes , Funny Quotes , Age Quotes

Woman begins by resisting a man's advances and ends by blocking his retreat.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Marriage Quotes

I know she's just trying to make things nice, so I do my part. Now, when I get up to use the bathroom in the middle of the night, I turn on the light. I used to just go by sonar: just keep peeing 'til you hear water.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Nice Quotes

It is a curious fact that people are never so trivial as when they take themselves seriously

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There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.

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Humor is also a way of saying something serious.

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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

"It's an old habit of mine, Wal'r," said the Captain, "any time these fifty year. When you see Ned Cuttle bite his nails, Wal'r, then you may know that Ned Cuttle's aground."

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes