Oscar Wilde Quotes, Funny Quotes, Humor Quotes

There is only one thing in life worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.

6 years ago

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Tags : Abraham Lincoln Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

She say, Celie, tell the truth, have you ever found God in church? I never did. I just found a bunch of folks hoping for him to show.

5 years ago

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Tags : Alice Walker Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

No man ever believes that the Bible means what it says: he is always convinced that it says what he means.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

An adventure is only an inconvenience rightly considered. An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered.

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Tags : Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

My own business always bores me to death; I prefer other people's.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Book Quotes

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Funny Quotes , Peace Quotes

People must not do things for fun. We are not here for fun. There is no reference to fun in any Act of Parliament.

6 years ago

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Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

The greatest thing in family life is to take a hint when a hint is intended-and not to take a hint when a hint isn't intended.

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Tags : Robert Frost Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

There is more to be said for stupidity than people imagine. Personally I have a great admiration for stupidity. It is a sort of fellow-feeling, I suppose.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , People Quotes

Humor is also a way of saying something serious.

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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Figure out what to do, then take a nap.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Sunshine is my quest.

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sunshine Quotes

He appeared to enjoy beyond everything the sound of his own voice. I couldn't wonder at that, for it was mellow and full and gave great importance to every word he uttered. He listened to himself with obvious satisfaction and sometimes gently beat time to his own music with his head or rounded a sentence with his hand.

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Men are like bank accounts. Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Men Quotes

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers.

5 years ago

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Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Funny Quotes , Inspiration Quotes

If you injure your neighbour, better not do it by halves.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Half Quotes

I talk a lot about women in my act, 'cause let's face it -- if I was hungry, I would talk about food.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes