Charles Dickens Quotes, Funny Quotes, Humorous Quotes

A man can well afford to be as bold as brass, my good fellow, when he gets gold in exchange!

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

As one reads history ... one is absolutely sickened, not by the crimes that the wicked have committed, but by the punishments that the good have inflicted.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Auto racing, bull fighting, and mountain climbing are the only real sports... all the others are games.

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Tags : Ernest Hemingway Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sports Quotes

I am always ready to learn although I do not always like being taught.

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Leadership Quotes

It's just as unpleasant to get more than you bargain for as to get less.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Mrs. Boffin, insisting that Bella should make tomorrow's expedition in the chariot, she went home in great grandeur. Mrs. Wilfer and Miss Lavinia had speculated much on the probabilities and improbabilities of her coming in this gorgeous state, and, on beholding the chariot from the window at which they were secreted to look out for it, agreed that it must be detained at the door as long as possible, for the mortification and confusion of the neighbours.

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Don't you drink? I notice you speak slightingly of the bottle. I have drunk since I was fifteen and few things have given me more pleasure.

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Tags : Ernest Hemingway Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

The majority of husbands remind me of an orangutan trying to play the violin.

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Tags : Honore De Balzac Quotes , Funny Quotes , Marriage Quotes

The trouble ain't that there is too many fools, but that the lightning ain't distributed right.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Inspiration Quotes

If one plays good music, people don't listen and if one plays bad music people don't talk.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Music Quotes

Why is it that we rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the person involved.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

There are some remarkable parallels between basketball and politics. Michael Jordan has already mastered the skill most needed for political success: how to stay aloft without visible means of support.

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Tags : Margaret Thatcher Quotes , Funny Quotes , Basketball Quotes

Let us work without theorizing, tis the only way to make life endurable.

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Tags : Voltaire Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

There is nothing the matter with Americans except their ideals. The real American is all right; it is the ideal American who is all wrong.

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Tags : Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes , Funny Quotes , Real Quotes

I like Wagner's music better than anybody's. It is so loud that one can talk the whole time without other people hearing what one says.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Music Quotes

Few women care to be laughed at and men not at all, except for large sums of money.

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Tags : Alan Ayckbourn Quotes , Funny Quotes , Money Quotes

The equation for ego is: One over Knowledge.

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Tags : Albert Einstein Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes

The only time my education was interrupted was when I was in school.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Senior Quotes

The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work.

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Tags : Robert Frost Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

If there were no God, it would have been necessary to invent him.

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Tags : Voltaire Quotes , Funny Quotes , Religion Quotes